Don’t quit your day job. . .

Envoy Mortgage does a lot of work with a local elementary school, donating books and volunteering with the kids. James went on one of these volunteer adventures a while back. His job was to sit in a rocking chair and read to a class of first graders. James did not get to choose the book. I don’t know who chose it, but the story was about this family whose house was robbed and burned down. James felt worse and worse with every turn of the page. I’m not sure if any of the kids actually cried, but it wouldn’t surprise me. When he finished he had to ask the kids questions about the book, like how they felt. “Sad and overwhelmed beyond my years,” was the gist of the replies. Next time I’m sending him with Oh the Places You’ll Go. Thankfully, Envoy donated a ton of school supplies to correct James’ hiccup.

Speaking of volunteering, Chad is a wreck. Seems he’s volunteered to sell season football tickets for his beloved University of Houston. He’s on the phone right now asking someone if they’d like to purchase tickets in the Cougar Pride section. Hayley, his production partner, is about to have a heart attack because Chad should be working on loans right now. She’s all, “Chad! What are you doing in there? Are you selling football tickets?!” Uh, Chad, I’m thinking you need to get back to working on these mortgages, buddy.

Real time reporting here, folks. . .

Chad is now taking a loan application over the phone, finally putting ticket hawking on hold. He’s pulling someone’s credit while they wait, building the suspense for the client saying, “Okay, I’m pulling it right now. . .what’s it gonna BE?!”

He’s so swamped that I’m not allowed to ask him any questions. He just talks in spurts between phone calls to tell me how busy he is. The thing is, I have some important questions I need answered. Being  condemned to silence, I’m going to need your help since he’ll talk to clients. Would you ask him what APR is? I’d like to write a blog post about it. Would you also ask him to change the date of our branch beach trip since it overlaps with a vacation I have planned? And while you’re at it, I’d love some new black heels. Okay that’s all. His number is (713) 826-8136 and he adores chatting with clients. Bonus points if you’d like a loan plus season tickets in the Cougar Pride section.

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