Just the Documentary Watcher

A good documentary can convince me to do just about anything.  I haven’t eaten fast food in the seven years since Supersize me came out, and if I ever have a baby, it’ll be from a kiddy pool in my kitchen with a woman wearing a long skirt and a bandana at my side since watching The Business of Being Born. My grocery bills doubled a couple of years ago when I switched to all organic food after watching Fresh, and the only reason I haven’t watched any of the documentaries on blood diamonds is because knowing me, I’ll end up crying every time I glance at my wedding ring.

A girlfriend and I recently watched Inside Job, a documentary about the Bad Guys I so often refer to who lied and stole and cheated and cussed and ruined the 2008 economy.  Like any good documentary, it really made me think.  Then it went beyond, and sent me into a mini depression for a couple of weeks.  Since you probably are not in the mortgage industry, and probably don’t care for my ole Bosses in quite the same way I do, the film probably won’t send you into a depression.  And if it does, call me; I love to commiserate with people.

I had never understood the phrases like toxic assets and “betting against themselves” and things of the sort until I saw the documentary.  I had also never understood completely how the liars, cheaters, stealers, and cussers had made it harder for my dear ole Bosses to do their job.  Finally, I’d never understood just how nice the ole Bosses were.  The documentary showed pictures of the bad guys and their stolen houses and tennis courts and fancy suits.  It made me thankful for James’ consecutive blue shirt days and Chad’s checky pants. And when you visit our charming bungalow office, you can rest assured knowing we didn’t swindle the poor in order to buy our Ikea furniture.

I’m not saying it’s a date movie, but I do recommend it.  Speaking of non-date movies, since watching Food Matters two weeks ago, I’ve started juicing all my organic vegetables, and not only am I slowly going broke, but I’m still in the experimental stage.  This Just the Assistant has spent most of the day in bed after an unfortunate encounter with a romaine-spinach-carrot concoction last night.  You’d think I’d drank a pint of whiskey.

Hopefully I’m better by tomorrow, because I’m heading up to the office to snoop. I’ve heard there’s been at least a little bit more happenings since last week, and I may even bring my video camera to make my own documentary.

I apologize for no funny quip to end today’s post.  I’m going back to bed now.