Business Tips from Just the Assistant and the Business Coach

Hi beloved mortgage readers! Fun news – I got to be a guest blogger for a totally hip new e-book publishing company, Kbuuk, this week. Check me out yo! Here’s my article.

Back to business. So about Chick-fil-A. . . Hee hee! Just kidding.

I have some weird news for you all. My ole Boss James is taking a half day off. That is quite weird alone, but the reason he’s taking off is even kookier.

Here’s the thing. James has a life/business coach. Let’s take a moment to allow that to sink in.

Now then, James’ business coach, whom I plan to call Coach from here on out, has given James an assignment to take half a day off and write the first draft of his very own “LIFE PLAN.” (I swear, James even wrote it in all caps like that in the e-mail he just sent the team letting us know he’ll be in Galveston this afternoon and won’t be answering his phone for the next four hours.)

Let’s take another moment to allow images of James sitting on the Galveston shore, breeze blowing through his hair, penning his LIFE PLAN as the gulls fly overhead to fill our minds. Ah. . .

Before we move on, allow me to share a business tip. If you search Google Images for any image in the entire world – I don’t care if it’s “refinishing kitchen cabinets” or “person writing on beach” like I just did – if you scroll down far enough, you will stumble upon images of naked ladies. “Wha?” you ask? Trust me.  I’ve been searching for goofy photos for this blog for almost two years now, and every single time I get to searching, naked ladies pop up. Just be careful, okay?

Now then, let’s move on.

While I don’t think I’ll have any cameos in the LIFE PLAN, I do anticipate at least being mentioned under the LIFE PLAN subheading “What I Aspire All Future Assistants of Mine to be Like.” I’ll be asking James for a copy of the LIFE PLAN Monday morning and let’s all hope he gives me permission to post it here.

Finally, I brought the ole Bosses another loan! Oh yes I did! About four years ago I told one of my pals how amazing James and Chad are. I told him all about how when you obtain a mortgage with James Beaver and Chad Helmcamp, they mail you these really cool moving stickers with labels like “Garage” and “Bedroom 2.” So moved was my friend by the promise of these moving stickers, that today, four years later, my friend closes on his very first house, mortgage courtesy of James Beaver with Envoy Mortgage! Congratulations, friend! Unfortunately, since I’m no longer the assistant, rather a useless former assistant who pilfers about the office, those moving stickers don’t get mailed out any longer. It was not my intention to trick my dear friend, but hey, at least he got a great home loan! And in case any of you are keeping track, that brings my grand total of loans I’ve brough the ole Bosses to four.

If you would like to join the rest of the intelligent universe and my four referrals and obtain your own little (or not so little) home loan from the finest in the industry, give me a shout. While I can’t promise moving stickers, I can promise a hardworking mortgage banker with at least the first draft of a LIFE PLAN in place.