An Intruder and a Caption Contest

Here is a picture of where I sit in our office:

And here is a picture of where, apparently, perfect strangers who aren’t even clients sit in our office:

Yesterday Andie, our wonderful new loan coordinator, announced she had a “friend,” Dave, coming to the office. Dave was in need of some quiet study space that his own home could not provide. Once he arrived, study materials in tow, I thought he looked familiar, and I instantly did not like him, though I couldn’t put my finger on why. Then James gives this guy his own office! He even adjusted the blinds for him so he’d have the best lighting. They even gave him plants!

I ventured in. “Can I take your picture for the blog?” Later, as I maliciously studied his picture, it clicked. I know why I don’t like this guy! I mean, besides the fact that I’ve been devoted to this place for over four years now and I just have a measly cube and he shows up for twenty-two seconds and gets his own office with a view. No, I don’t like him because he owes me $77 and wasn’t wearing pants the first time I met him.

A few months back, see, I rented a house for a friend’s wedding. “Rented” meaning this was not a free house in which anybody could crash willy nilly. No, all of my pals chipped in accordingly and we planned on a lovely weekend filled with poolside drinks and dancing into the night. The morning after the wedding, as I padded to the kitchen in search of oatmeal, I noticed a person whom I did not recognize asleep on the couch.

This person had not paid me. And he was using a table runner as a blanket. And he wasn’t wearing pants.

And now he’s got his own office with a view and his very own Christmas tree in our office. Hmph.

I need something to cheer me up now. You probably do to. I’ve got it – a caption contest should do the trick.

Please comment below with your funniest caption to the following picture. The winner will be chosen by Andie, because she has a great sense of humor, and I hope to secure her some better friends out of this deal. If you win, you will receive your very own Just the Assistant t-shirt. As always, you may choose between a fitted-T, metrosexual T, or beefy T.

 Here’s your photo. I’m sorry it’s fuzzy, but I feel there is a lot going on here that you fine folks can work with. Now put your funny pants on and comment away, and I’ll announce the winner next week.