Welcome Back, Gobe! (Kind of)

The ole Boss Chad is getting nervous (what’s new?) about the Save the Blog party (that y’all better come to or I swear I’ll lose it).

Ole Boss Chad: What if, like, 200 people show up?

Just the Assistant: Ha! That’s your problem, buddy. This wasn’t my idea. Ha! I hope I do get 200 people.

(I’m at forty but I didn’t mention that.)

He has other reasons to be nervous though. He’s about to lose one of his best mortgage bankers if he doesn’t pull out a vacuum and learn how to organize a bit better.

Here’s the thing. Hollywood Insider Gobe is back. Y’all might remember that Hollywood Gobe was pregnant a while back, and while she was busy giving birth and raising an infant, she took a few months off. Well, not only is she back, but she gets a big swanky office! (I think she closed like a thousand loans or something and it’s her reward).

Doesn’t that sound great? A nice office with a view of downtown? (A very distant view, mind you. We’re not rolling in the dough over here.) Hollywood Insider Gobe thought it was going to be great, too. She probably kissed her baby goodbye that first day back and whispered, “Mommy’s getting a swanky office! Now gimme some sugar!”

Too bad Gobe came back to a big old copy machine and an overgrown dead plant and about a dozen other pieces of crap (specifically a three-hole punch, this giant stapler, a stack of paper for the copier, four rolling chairs and an exercise ball) piled up in her “office.”

Oh, and the lights don’t work.

The ole Bosses made a big to-do of presenting it to her too, thanking her for her stellar performance, and she was like, “Um, thanks.”

The thing is, the ole Bosses had stuck the copy machine and anything else they didn’t know what to do with in Gobe’s new office while she was gone, thus turning her office into the copy room. Let me poll you all. Do you think it was a good idea or a bad idea for the ole Bosses to leave the copy machine and a bunch of other junk in their top producer’s new office once she came back? (Mind you, the reason Gobe got this office is because she does tons of business.)

Spanish-Speaking Richard enjoys the new resident in the copy room.

I managed to squeeze into Gobe’s new office to ask her a few questions:

Just the Assistant: Nice office, Gobe! How did you close so many loans last year?

HIG: I don’t know. I just worked.

JTA: Well that’s just fascinating, Gobe. Our readers will be thrilled, I swear.

HIG: I don’t know. I just worked and followed up with clients and got deals done on time?

JTA: Girl, you need to take some bragging classes from Online Dater Jason. So what’s your plan now that you’re back?

HIG: I’m just building up my business again. And I’m going to have a happy hour for my realtors in a couple of weeks.

[Realtors go nuts over this lady.]

JTA: That’s so fun! Realtors go nuts over you. They should send you leads to welcome you back! Okay, you get back to work and I’m going to make some copies, okay?

While Gobe gets back to work (in the dark), you all comment below and tell me you’re coming to my Save the Blog party. Now, off to screw something up to ensure the ole Bosses never “reward” me with my very own office.